Motherhood

The other day I was listening to a song on the radio (another great thing about Pensacola is there is a decent Christian radio station). I think it is called the song is called Blessed be your Name. As I was singing along (trying to drown out my screaming toddler in the back) I began to contemplate the song. After all, what else do you have to do in the car rider pick up lane? There is a verse at the end that says "you give and take away, you give and take away - my heart will choose to say blessed be Your name". I couldn't help but think that in my case lately it is my MIND that chooses to say. Sometimes during the mundane daily activities of being mom you have to persevere. Mind over matter if you will. There are days where I just have to will myself to press on. The most challenging thing for me lately (and my husband I think as well) is the relentless screams we hear from our son. Daily I wonder to myself "Lord, when will he stop doing this?". Unfortunately neither of my children have a volume control so I am afraid that even when the screaming stops I will still be left with one loud little boy! But that's ok, that makes him who he is I guess. The point is that as moms I think sometimes it just comes down to sheer determination somedays. And a battle of wills with our children. I know that deep in my heart God is there rooting me on and I have to remind myself of that. I was reading one of my MOPS emails (that I just started looking at after getting them for 4 years). It echoed just what I was thinking in my car the other day:

Motherhood is hard. It takes resources, strength, time and commitment I never thought I could summon. And then, when I've lost it and just can't take another whine, another "mom, can you..." I remind myself that motherhood is my job right now. I am a mom. While I hold many subtitles; personal shopper, dietician, chef, maid, chauffer; first and foremost, I am a mom. And I am proud to be a mom. Sometimes I have to say it out loud, "this is my job!" When I embrace the fact that motherhood requires my involvement - that I cannot parent from the couch or the computer chair - I am much better at it.

I have printed that email and will be pasting it to my fridge to remind myself of "my job". Especially on those days when I want to call in sick!